Can I send you a dick pic?Business / Sep 8th 2016  at 07:50AM   /   0

Dear KC, you list "body image issues" as something you work with. Does that include the penis? I worry mine is too small and figure you've seen a few so would be a good judge. It's smaller than what I see in porn, and though I've been told it's fine by past girlfriends they could be lying. I'd appreciate your professional opinion. Can I email a pic?

Thanks for reaching out. I empathize with your concerns. We all want to feel like we measure up, and I've been there myself. When I was 20, I had a fling with a man I really liked. He was quite the playboy, but a good guy who'd never purposely hurt my feelings. One night over the phone, he commented on my labia in a way that made me self-conscious about their shape, color, and general "appearance" for the first time in my life.

I hurriedly ended the call and spent the rest of the evening curled on my couch, obsessing on the aesthetics of female genitalia. Did other women have prettier, daintier vulvas than mine? I'd been intimate with more than a few woman myself by then, well-aware of variations in size, color, and shape. To me, they were all lovely and perfect. That there were conventional standards of pussy beauty had never entered my mind.

I eventually quit worrying about it. Not one man, over the next 30 years, brought the topic up again. And when I asked, my lovers would express opinions inline with mine. Basically, "Who cares if they're pink, brown, tidy, tucked, or winged like a butterfly? It's all good, as long as they bring you pleasure."

My point is, as far as body image issues go, I feel ya. It's human nature to want to fit in. Also to fall prey to the belief we must look alike in order to do that. We don't all look alike and thank goodness for it. I should know, since (as you say) I've "seen a few." (Fyi, I've seen more than a few.) So, yes, I will view and rate your dick pics. On a couple conditions.

I'm happy to give my professional opinion about where on the "size & appearance scale" your penis falls. But to keep this professional you must compensate me. To send dick pics for review, email your request to [email protected] listing specific concerns (size, shape, girth, color, etc.). Do NOT send pics in your initial email. Once I've received your request, I'll send instructions for paying an honorarium fee of $20. Once that's received you may email pics, up to 3, which should be enough to cover the necessary angles. (If you feel you must send more, the fee is $10 each.) 

I understand your concerns and am happy to give my honest opinion, as long as you remember it's just that: one woman's opinion. I'm not a doctor and do not give medical advice. If you think you have an STI or cancerous growth, call your doctor immediately. I'll be zero help there. 

Also, keep in mind this is not a game to me, nor a way to get my rocks off. It's solely to provide information and lend perspective in an area few people are comfortable discussing or qualified to speak on. Hopefully, this info will be validating and confidence boosting to you. For me, it's simply 20 minutes of time well spent, writing 2 short paragraphs about an area in which I have expertise. Once my review is sent, there's no need to continue correspondence. (To be clear, once you've received your review, unless you have valid follow-up questions, do not continue emailing.)

Lastly, My Penis and I is a touching and funny documentary by a guy with similar concerns. It's about embracing your body, and loving and appreciating your genitals as they are. I love my labia just as they are and wouldn't trade them for anyone's. I feel the same about every penis I've had the pleasure of meeting. For the record, two of the best lovers of my life had smaller-than-average penises. For me, and many other women, size just isn't a factor, aesthetically or sexually.

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