Welcome to my blog!

SESSION DISCOUNTS, packages & intensives [Pinned post]Business  /  Dec 31st 2019

UPDATE: Due to an increasingly full schedule my availability for coaching sessions is limited. I accept new clients on a case-by-case basis, with wait times for phone consults and in-person sessions sometimes as long as 8-12 weeks. 

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How do I build confidence when I lack the confidence to gain more experience?Activities  /  Apr 24th 2019

You've just landed on a conundrum as old as time.

[ be continued] 

IPSA-trained Surrogate Parter (Affiliation Update)Business  /  Mar 13th 2019

In February 2019, I was offered full certification by the International Professional Surrogates Association (IPSA), the organization under which I trained and successfully completed a two year internship (in July 2018). I declined the offer for a number of reasons, none based in the quality of their training or highly effective niche modality of sex therapy. 

While I met every certification requirement, including

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MUST WATCH Kissing Scenes (a tutorial)Activities  /  Jan 21st 2019

I'm still in the process of compiling this list, but it's come in handy, over the years, with dating coach clients and the late-life virgins I work with. 

The first thing to know is that kissing is not an innate ability, it's a learned skill. Some men have a knack for it, I suppose, though usually due to putting more thought and care into it than most.

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Women's Anatomy of Arousal, by Sheri WinstonSex  /  Dec 20th 2018

Full review coming soon (for now: FIVE STARS, highly recommended)

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A Comprehensive Guide to Premature EjaculationSex  /  Nov 19th 2018

Premature ejaculation (also known as unintentional or early ejaculation) is the most commonly cited male sexual issue. It’s been reported to affect 20-30% of the male population, however with most of those cases turning out to be "occasional" or "situational," current thinking puts the prevalence of treatment-worthy PE closer to 8-15%.

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Living an Orgasmic Life, by Xanet PailetActivities  /  Sep 12th 2018

The field of intimacy coaching (also sex, love, and relationship coaching) is expanding at a rapid rate, and yet the wide range of available modalities is off he average person’s radar. And why wouldn't it be? Until the need arises, why waste time Googling “painful sex,” “can’t orgasm,” or “Just what the hell is Tantric sex anyway?” (Or was that last one just me, off & on, throughout my 30s...? Ok

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Video Interview: Kissing, Seduction, Lust, Libido, Empathy, and (Consensual) ObjectificationIntimacy  /  Jul 25th 2018

Check out my new video interview (a first!), with Derek Hart. Nearly ninety minutes of fun, fascinating, Intimacy Coaching related topics.

More Help for Premature EjaculationSex  /  May 24th 2018

Due to my recent book release, time is in short supply these days. I have a list of "Dear KC" questions to answer and post, yet one or two thousand other tasks that need tending to first.

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Prep Your PadActivities  /  Apr 23rd 2018

Dear KC, What do you mean my home isn't date-friendly?!

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How does performance anxiety take hold of my brain?Intimacy  /  Mar 22nd 2018

Dear KC, How does performance anxiety take such powerful hold of me, and at the worst times? It's gotten so bad I find myself making excuses to end dates early, to avoid risking more embarrassing ED. Why is my body suddenly working against me?

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What's the difference between coaching and counseling?Activities  /  Feb 21st 2018

Dear KC, Aside from education and licensing requirements, what's the difference between a coach and therapist? 

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What are the biggest issues for men & women dating in their 60s?Compatibility  /  Jan 20th 2018

I was recently asked to sit for an interview on the topic of senior dating. On the pre-submitted list of questions was one about the challenges men and women face dating in their 60s. I'm not unfamiliar with these issues, since many of my clients are in that age group. Still, I decided to take an informal poll, getting input from both sexes by querying a few dozen of my friends, clients, and acquaintances. My findings were

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What's the difference between sensual and erotic?Intimacy  /  Oct 19th 2017

Dear KC, It seems like sensuality is an aspect of your coaching work. How does sensual differ from erotic? Are they two distinct spots on the same scale? And if so, where is the line between them?

The short answer:
Sensual pertains solely to the senses, of which there are five physical. Sensuality is not inherently sexual, though it can lead to and enhance sexual activity.

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Why aren't men better at opening up?Intimacy  /  Sep 19th 2017

Dear KC, My boyfriend is under a lot of stress at work, but won't talk to me about it. I tell him I'm here for him, but how can I make him feel better if he won't open up? He's always been this way, like if we've hit a rough patch in our relationship and I want to understand what's not working for him, he'll clam up and change the subject. Why don't men understand that it helps to talk about this stuff?

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How to have the grooming talk?Intimacy  /  Aug 18th 2017

Dear KC, I'm seeing a new guy who's a real outdoorsy type. He hikes, camps, and spends extended periods in the wilderness. He's phenomenally fit, yet also unkempt, with excess hair everywhere (crotch, nose, eyebrows, ears, etc.) Also, he doesn't trim his nails often enough (toenails especially, ugh). The lack of basic grooming is a real distraction (read: turn-off). The thing is, I r

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Got No Game?Intimacy  /  Jul 17th 2017

Dear KC, I'm crazy about a woman I've taken on three dates, each more awkward than the last. I don't know why, but I lose all my wit, charm, and conversational skills in her presence. I can barely open her door without tripping over myself. We have a certain spark, but at this rate how long can it last? I got no game and don't know what to do about it.

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How can I be more physically in tune with my partner?Intimacy  /  Jun 16th 2017

Dear KC, I was in a sexless marriage for twenty-five years. I've recently begun dating and suddenly feel like a bull in a china shop. I'm graceful enough on a basketball court (or once was, anyway), and even danced with my daughter at her wedding without stepping on her toes. In bed though, I'm rusty, awkward and clumsy. Can a person learn sensuality? 

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